Journal 0010

Hey double digits!

So I’m awful at this journal thing, as basically anyone can tell from my posting history on this blog… Yeah, I feel like I’m reaching new levels of how much I suck every day that I’m still here on this god forsaken planet.

I don’t understand why I even get up in the morning, oh wait I do! It’s because I’m too much of a fucking coward to even off myself. Instead I spend all my time bitching online instead of talking to people.

So my partner is thinking of transitioning. I don’t know. I just don’t know anymore. At all, who I am, what I’m supposed to do. I’m just a pile of shit and I’m rambling again. I’ve picked up smoking again. Yay.

For fucks sake. I’m just awful, I just can’t. I’m seriously going to figure something out one day. Some way for me to feel free or out of this awful cycle of hating myself.

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